😈 10 Ways to Know You’re Not Cut Out For A Cubicle

Are you in cubicle hell like in the pic above?

I wish I could take credit for these but this list actually comes from a gal named Alli Woods Frederick, with some minor tweaks of my own in there for clarity.

That said, its still how I feel, since I work a cubicle job and I know many others with this type of job will relate.

Lets get to it:

#1) When your work clothes feel like the nylon equivalent of a medieval torture device

#2) The mere thought of going back to work makes you feel like going bat-shit crazy on some one or some thing

#3) When clocking in each morning feels like yet another date with the Grim Reaper

#4) When you realize your number of wrinkles and gray hairs are directly proportional to your number of work emails

#5) When the words “Team Meeting” literally make your head spin

#6) When you realize EXACTLY how you spend 8 hours of your day, 5 days a week…knowing full well you only actually get 15 minutes of any real work done on any given day

#7) …And that spending your life that way is driving you INSANE

#8) Which makes you fantasize about blowing up the entire f’king office

#9) Then you realize how hard it is to get a hold of a thermo-nuclear device and begin to consider other ways to deal with the stress & bullshit, i.e. synthetic substances via hypodermic injections (drugs)

#10) But then you remember you’re afraid of needles so you think about quitting which makes you feel all giddy inside

If any or all of these thoughts and feelings occur to you as you sit in cubicle hell, drowning in a flood of emails…

…Or if Patty comes by and asks you to sign a birthday card and chip in for a cake and a present for Julie, who you’ve never met and don’t honestly give two shits about, makes option #8, blowing up the office,  seem brilliant to the point that you start searching eBay for a used copy of ‘The Anarchist Cookbook’, then this list is for you.

You, Sir or Maam, need to start considering a change of venue because this cubicle stuff just isn’t your cup of tea!

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See you inside,

~Mike J Anthony

“Terminating the forces of financial slavery and poverty”